I HAVE to get it.

So I'm a stage preformer. I do lots of plays and I LOVE it!! its my life. This year my school is doing Once On This Island. The roll of Ti Moune was a role i was born to play. I want it soo bad. Last year I our school did the musical Beauty and the Beast. That was my first well "breakout" roll. Can you guess who I was? NOPE. Not Belle. LeFou. Yup. I played a fat ugly man. Don't get me wrong it was fun but, I hated it because I got ,ade fun of all the time. My costume made look like that Janise chick from the movie Mean Girls. I'm not over dramatising anything!! But the only problem with this role in Once On This Island is that ALL the girls want to be her. But, not everyone can be her because she has to be a triple threat. Which I am. I can sing, dance, and act!! Ti Moune is known for her dancing and I've been dancing since I was 4. So i'm not super worried about some girls but, there are two..My BEST friend Jaci and another chick. The girl who played well, a lead that i wanted last year....(:  Let me tell you something. This girl can dance beautifully!! Wayy better than I can but SHE CAN'T FREAKING SING TO SAVE HER LIFE!! She was completely type casted as this lead. She is beautiful. And little. Thats one reason besides her being able to dance that I'm afraid she might get it. And then Jaci. I love that girl to peices. And I won't be bad if she gets it but I want it. She's a beautiful singer and a very good dancer. And she pretty. And skinny. And those two things my friends, are the reasons that I think I won't get the part. I'm just as good as them. But I don't look like them. I keep having these dreams about the auditions. My drama teacher pulls me aside and tells me that she thinks I diserve the part but she can't give it to me because I'm not pretty enough or little enough. Needless to say I'm freaked. I dont know what to do. I just need to calm the freak down! Well for whoever's reading this, thanks for reading. Let's wish for less pathetic blogging next time shall we?
love,
YoungBlood